Clayton Mitchell New Zealand First MP

Things are clearly not going so well in New Zealand at the moment. Income inequality, lack of housing, hyper-immigration, and reports that one third of our waterways are so polluted that it would not be safe to swim in them. So, rather than try to fix things, this blue government has decided to rejig the definition of “swimmable”.

They've fudged the figures to suit their PR agenda, and have now said it's acceptable to have more than double the amount of E coli to be “excellent” for swimming. So hooray! Just like magic, all those waterways that, only yesterday were only safe for wading and sailing are now just fine for swimming. It's not really that important that you might have a 1 in 20 chance of getting sick if you do plan on enjoying this newly “excellent” water.

The government have had a conversation with themselves and decided if we can't fix it we'll fudge it and hope no one gets sick until after the election.

If we can't meet the accepted targets, let's just lower the bar. Is this the kind of country we want New Zealand to be? We've been seeing more and more of this over the last few years. New Zealanders know that wages are stagnant and most Kiwis are going backwards. New Zealanders know that unemployment is far higher than the government suggests because they (the government) count you as employed if you have even one hour of paid work a week. New Zealanders know that there aren't enough police, but by fiddling with the crime statistics, all of a sudden maybe there are.

So polluted water is now “excellent” and “swimmable”. What's next? Burglaries will soon be called ‘borrowings', stabbings will be called ‘pokings', home invasions will become ‘popping in'.

Instead of sneaky word-play, we, in New Zealand First offer straight talk and straight forward solutions. Our policy is to make our waterways safe and clean – pure and simple. ‘100% Pure' must not be empty words. We will keep them honest and keep it real.